As a...

As a human being I have the need to want to fix things. I want to work on issues an talk about struggles until I feel better. It's only been this last year that the Lord has quieted me in that area. As I am being transformed I am laying down the need to be pushy with what I want... even if what I want is a righteous thing. It's a work in progress, but I believe one day I may even express a meek and quiet Spirit(the Spirit of Christ) in every situation.
As a person I want to be liked and included in everything. When I hear about a group of friends that's gotten together I feel left out, naturally. Towards the end of this year I began to recognize that I don't even like being in groups. They bring on heaps of anxiety for me. I like being at home with my family. I also see that groups are meant to include(those invited) and exclude(those not invited). There are only a few types of groups that don't do this. Recently old friends of ours separated and their church has stopped talking to one of them. I would say churches were safe from being called "exclusive" but obviously not.
As a married lady I need to have security from my husband. I need to know that he only has eyes for me. I need to know that he'll never use his strength against me. Unfortunately we are not promised forever from our mere mortal spouses, but we are from Christ. So this year I learned that nothing is promised. Chris and I are the happiest we have ever been and more in love that I thought possible, but Christ is the only eternal thing.
As a mom I've learned that I know less than I thought. I know that while free in Christ, I enjoy His direction and am happy to follow His lead. This year Christ gave me new boldness in my parenting because it's all been by His life. Right now my kids are young and as a parent I have the God-given control and God-given authority. I am not blown by the wind by this or that anymore. I read homeschool blogs daily and subscribe to 3 hs magazines. Every time I'd hear about a new system or curriculum or style, I would try it out or simply doubt what we were currently using. I have also found my voice when it come to parenting philosophies that we've implemented. I am the only one in our church group that doesn't reward for good behaviour(we punish for bad and being good is it's own reward). I have been able to speak up and find my voice in this safe environment where no one wants to hurt me. Had I done this in the world I would have been steamrolled into changing or made to feel like I was being controlling.
I have one more... "As a Saint living by Christ's life I've learned...", but it's going to have to wait. That one's getting a whole blog entry on February 1st.
Thanks for reading and joining me in this eventful year of writing. No one replies on here, but so many of you have let me know that you read my writing. Keeping this blog has been therapeutic and helpful to me. The fact that you read it, is frosting on the cake. I love you friends and family!
Happy New Year!
Love,
Jackie