A natural, physical world exists and a supernatural, or spirit, world exists. The more I come to know Christ the more the lines becomes blurred.
I learned during childbirth just how much power our minds and our will can have over the flesh. The physical act of pain and the supernatural world I remained in, in my spirit, joined and I was able to control the pain with focus of the mind. As a christian that chooses to die to myself and remain in Him, Christ's will is so much more powerful than mine ever was.
I have seen more than once someone have pain and flu symptoms for loooong periods of time while having nothing physically wrong. Completely fine and healthy inside the body, while truly feeling the sensation of pain and nausea. When someone believes they are ill and feels symptoms, then actual illness follows because a healthy lifestyle is not kept up. When the soul and mind aren't fed with time in the sun, time with friends doing things we enjoy, and eating foods we love we will begin to wither. I have also known friends that have been sick in the body, yet totally healthy in the mind and have very few symptoms. My grandmother that just died was extremely ill for a few years and I had no idea. She was a beautiful picture of strength, although I wish she would have let us know so we could support her. As I began to find out more about how she died and the illness she lived with, I am amazed that she was able do everything she did while sick. She was a tough broad.
Something really interesting I noticed a few years ago was the pattern of pain in the last several years of my life. What I am about to write is a testament to the power of the will, the mind, or the Spirit in us.
I have been in physical pain since shortly after Jake was born. It was a difficult and complicated pregnancy. The pain afterwards was often severe and I spent lots of time on the couch or laying on bed. I got surgery to help alleviate some of the discomfort. A week after my surgery Chris had an aneurysm. He was "out of commission" for about 6 months. During that time I had to handle everything... bills, housework, cleaning, cooking, taking care of the kids, driving Chris to and from rehab, caring for Chris(I had to help him shower and get dresses for the first month), and everything else that husbands and wives do to care for a home and family. I was busy, but I did it all and never noticed pain. I didn't have time for pain. The same month Chris became self sufficient and went to work, I started feeling pain in my abdomen. What the heck? I tried hard to pretend that I wasn't hurting. I pretended to be in charge of everything again because maybe I could trick my body. It didn't work. Within 6 months I had a hysterectomy for pain caused by endo and adenomyosis.
I think about that time often. Was it really because I was so busy that my mind was overriding my body and I wasn't having to deal with pain? Was the Lord taking the pain from me because I wouldn't have been able to care for my family? I don't know, but when I feel pain now sometimes I wonder if I just need more to do (just kidding).
I went to the doctor yesterday. I learned how to relax and breathe through painful or difficult episodes. My doctor is big on health, nutrition, yoga, and the avoidance of prescription medication. She was letting me know that stress, depression, and drama will make the sensation of pain feel worse than it is. This is a doctor telling me this. So sickness and pain can absolutely begin in the mind and manifest in the body. Does that make it any less real? Nope. I pray for both the same. When a person is not well we never really know where the origin lies... head, body, or both. When I was a kid I would pretend to be sick so my mom wouldn't send me to school. Whenever I fought with my friends I would want to stay home and nurse my little 6yr old frivolous wounds. My mom knew that I wasn't truly sick, but she would give me attention and affection and lots of love. Just saying I was sick when I wasn't is letting her know that somethings wrong, something isn't well, but it's in my spirit and not so much in my body. I think it's just easier to say we don't feel well in the body.
We are so intricately connected. We can heal ourselves with the faith of a mustard seed and we can also become very sick just by being unwell in the mind and spirit.
I have to end this now, running out of time!
Thanks for reading!
Love,
Jackie
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